This Free Offer From Your Government Finally Puts You in Control
Barack Obama's "Living Constitution"
Editorial Preface: You will note that the text below of Barack Obama's "Living Constitution" is blank.
This is a living document, and words can be so limiting, especially during times of historic moment when change is the order of the day.
If such an admittedly audacious approach to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" meets with your felt needs and values, and with American Values as you understand them, please fill in the living text below at your own personal discretion.
Also, please revise and amend and apply at your discretion. Space is unlimited (as authorized by the U.S. Supreme Court, a living institution).
Let there be no mistake: This is a safe space for freedom. You are in control.
Moreover, as a free gift from your government, at no charge to you, this offer is affordable to all.
NOW YOU ARE READY FOR THE ADVENTURE OF A LIFETIME.
CREATE YOUR OWN PERSONAL LIVING CONSTITUTION IN THE UNLIMITED BLANK SPACE PROVIDED BELOW:
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A Word From the Federal Department of Freedom: Liberty loving individuals are strongly encouraged to take advantage of this historic offer. Penalities for racial, heterosexist, wealthist, and other unfair and nonprogressive forms of noncompliance may ensue, subject to further deliberation for the greater good on Capitol Hill. For further assistance, please contact a customer service representative at the IRS, FBI, NSA, White House, or Office of Nancy Pelosi. Just call the following centralized (for your convenience) phone number: 202-666-1984 (calls may be monitored to ensure quality control).